Want Vs. Don't Want

Though my wedding preparation is quite mundane these days, I just have to vent this out.

What I want versus what I don't want.

Funny how my fiancé wanted our wedding to be grand-ier than what I initially wanted and planned. And funny how it comes out from the groom and not the bride.

In "want" versus "don't want" list,

I don't want:

  • any bunga pahar/bunga telur or whatever you called it. You know, the things you put at the side of the pelamin to be given out during merenjis ceremony?
  • pengapit. I don't see the point of having one (pair), Yet, this is that started the argument. Fiancé had already asked his cousin to be one without even consulting and asking me first, whether I want one. (Bridezilla alert!)
  • flower girls or bridemaids. Again, they look pretty but I don't see the point.
  • any majlis merenjis. Pelamin is strictly for photography session. But I'm having mixed feeling about this. I'm sure my parents want to merenjis. (Status: KIV)
  • inai or inai lukis/ukir whatever. My mom didn't wear inai during her wedding so I don't think she'll object the idea. Oh well, maybe inai just on the NAILS and not on the fingers.
  • to wear any crown or head jewellery. Rimas akak noks.
  • any un-edible wedding favours. I already veto-ed off mom's idea of giving out potpurri.

I want:

  • my marriage to be blessed by Allah S.W.T, my family and those that are matter to me the most. Note the marriage and not the wedding?
  • my families and guests to be comfortable and mingle with each other during the wedding.
  • not to spend much on wedding but rather the life after the wedding itself.
  • to held a wedding that is "me" and not some people's idea of what my wedding should be.
  • my wedding not to be the cookie-cutter and stereo-typical wedding.
  • all in all, a simple wedding that is close to my heart.

I went to friend's wedding yesterday in USJ 5. The bride and groom looked pretty and handsome in their nikah attire. They didn't have any pelamin, just meja pengantin on the stage and yet, the wedding looked so beautiful. The bride and groom mingled around with their guests. The groom (our batchmate) even lepak-ed at our table until his bride stole him away. Hiks.

I mean how sweet is that?

Sigh, sometimes I wonder why is it hard to do something that is out of the norm? I think, I'm not asking much. I just don't want so many things, and it should be easy than wanting most of the things, right?


sarahsayangjiman said...

you're right but we are used to having so many things sampai having less is an issue.hehe.

anyway..pelamin my friend tu dia amik dekat butik ni:

tak sure nama butik tu but she calls the owner paksu:
(belakang insaniah)

NO PHONE PAKSU: 016-4156446

krina said...

i also want a simple wedding where i can happily talk n spend time with my friends n relatives. all the best for u..just pray for the best from-Him :)

reena said...

Babe, samala kita. Esp the inai thingy. I pun nak atas nail je. Tu pun kalau nak ikutkan tak nak inai, just nail color, boleh? Huhu.

sumpit said...

i realize that despite wanting everything to b simple, there are certain things that i'm willing to spend extra bucks on, tp willing je la, buatnya tatau la kan...

Tp i guess nasib gak la my mom sanggup meet me half-way, e.g. i also didnt want any bunga pahar, or pelamin or a cake-cutting ceremony. So nanti telur bg camtu je, pelamin buat ambik gmbr semata2 n cake ganti pulut kunin.
Kesian gak my mom dah survey 2 kedai cake, when i found out about it, told her i dont want any sbb cam pelik potong cake, tp bukan semua guest bole makan pon, kecik2 dulu i always waited for the cake, alih2 smpai balik pon x dpt merasa. I dont want my guests to feel the same. Tp mom wants something like tht still n suggested pulut sbb it reminds her of zaman dulu2, terpaksa la agree, takkan sume pon xnak, dah la diorg yg nak buatkan pon. And besides, pulut kuning org x peduli sgt kot...

Yg bab mingle2 tu bukan bound to happen ke? I mean, if u dont hv a program tht takes up the whole day/nite, mmg lepas makan, bride/groom sure mingle2 kan? Or at least, tht's how it was like with most of my frens' weddings, unless the guests leave early la...

Weh, tak p ka wedding Qis, tgk makeup kak ram camne?

NahWaL said...

If only we had the power to decide all on our own. IF ONLY. I wanted a dance floor for my wedding. Not to follow the western, but just to have fun. HA HA HA> bole? FAt chance. kalao joget lambak bolehla. seriously memang nak sangat. but the hall is too small and maybe we'll have one when the guests are all gone. LOL.

Grooms can be groomzillas kan? its not that cute when it happens to u aite? HA HA. aku tak ejek ko nok, tapi ramai kata awww comel apa dia caring. Caring la sangat, buat kita naik gile je. HA HA HA

Qis said...

Babe, your 'want & don't want' is similar like mine... I copy & paste bole? hahhaha... *padahal majlis dah lepas... heheheh

i got most of it, MOST... *not in the mood to complain yet, pg2 ni... hehee

so, i bg OMBAK utk u tanda sokongan ur wants & dont wants... good luck, dear!

Moose said...


yes, we're the same and thanks!

yang mingle2 tu in some kenduris that i went, bride die sebuk tangkap gambar posing sana sini, sampai takde masa nak bermingle-mingle dengan guests. some tu ade la bride mingle2. tu pun klo u datang lambat. i tanak macam tu. i nak jumpe and mingle with semua guests.

Moose said...

dance floor? coolness! buat jangan tak buat noks. best ape. boleh berpoco-poco. mak ko sure terer. cikgu2 ni bound to terer menari poco-poco, macam mak aku. pergi kursus mana2 mesti ade poco-poco. motipp?
in fact fiance's family love to dance. matilah aku klo belah dia ade menari2 ni. aku dahla keras macam kayu, takde rhythm langsung

kopipes jangan tak kopipes! thanks! nanti bila2 masa free, buatla post-mortem ye qis?

shueyluweyduwey said...

boleh tak, nak letak *amat suka*!! =) i like ur wants and needs. almost similar too!!

ZARA said...

well said. I share ur thoughts. :)

Xora said...

Saya sokong 'dont want' yang flower girls, merenjsi, crown dan unedible wedding favours. yang bunga phar, dan inai tu tak dapat elak pasal permintaan family. tapi yg pengapit tu kena pasal dah janji dari kecik sapa kawin dlu, kena jadi pengapit :P

sumpit said...

nak tambah satu lg, makan ramai2 meja bulat, mcm relax sikit, enjoy skit, muka sume semeja nmpak. Malu weh, makan beradap.

Tp ni kalu sugg kat my family, xyah ckp pon dah tau sure kena reject.

Moose said...

boleh sajork! haha.

i ingat i sorang je gila tanak itu ini. sampai my fiance cam eh, ini dah jadi bukan kenduri kahwin sebab "all things that make up kenduri kahwin melayu" i tanak.

xora, betul macam pelamin and merenjis tu status dia KIV sebab i'm sure family nak benda tu. pengapit tu pun i'm having mixed feeling about it. kesian my fiance aritu after i became bridezilla over that matter. now i think i'll compromise with him on that and prolly ade pengapit kot.

yes! meja makan bulat! aku dah bagitau parents utk family my fiance makan pakai meja bulat. utk yang guests lain2 tu pakai meja panjang takpe so that they can mingle with others.

ZARA said...

You are not alone. no worries. I pon banyak tak nak tu, tak nak ni. Belah I, mmg dream on lah. Tapi belah BF i possible. hihi. I tunang pon tak buat, kawen nnti, dua2 belah takda pelamin. haha. jimat duit. :) boleh bayar down payment rumah.

Moose said...

betul! have not seen the price of pelamin nowadays? boleh buat downpayment kereta/rumah ok! membazir je i rasa buat pelamin mahal2 then duduk for 1-2 hours, top. tapi taktaula kot ade pengantin yang tanak bangun2 dari pelamin sampai ke malam kan. hihi. kematu bontot.